The Magnificent Brett Claywell

Hi, I'm Brett Claywell. I'm gorgeous, smart, talented, charming, sexy, and just about perfect. Feel free to worship me. You know you want to.

I've never had any interest in watching a soap opera. Then one day I read about a soap running a gay storyline that supposedly wasn't completely insulting to gay audiences. In other words, it didn't have a solitary, neutered gay character, whose sole purpose was being the "funny" best friend of the main straight character, up until that inevitable episode when the gay character gets beaten into a coma by some homophobes just so the straight character can give a heartfelt speech about how the world would be a better place if only all straight people were tolerant of us neutered, funny, gay sidekicks. So I decided to give this soap opera, One Life to Live a view, even though it's on the same channel that provides us with such sterling entertainment as "Dancing with the Otherwise-unemployed Entertainers", "America's Funniest Baby Vomitting on GrandMa", and "Desperate Whorewives". And that's where I first encountered the beautiful Brett Claywell. Yes, Brett is very pretty. But, that's not even the first thing I noticed. What immediately hooked me was that voice -- that husky, sometimes seductive and at other times overflowing with raspy angst, instrument, endowed with just a hint of irresistably charming southern drawl to give it personality. What a fantastic tool for an actor to have. I thought "Wow, I love this guy's voice". I could raptly listen to Brett even as he's reading the back of a Cornflakes cereal box. Can you imagine what this guy is going to sound like as his voice matures even more? After just enjoying his voice for awhile, that's when I noticed what a lot of other folks have also noticed. Brett's gorgeous. I thought "Wow, this is a very pretty man. I enjoy looking at him.".

Because Brett is so handsome, and his voice is so appealing, I confess that I was too distracted admiring his physical presense to notice what should have been readily apparent. In a scene in which he confronts his college lover, Olivier Fish, Brett suddenly bursts into an angry intensity that kind of startled me. In his next scene, the vulnerable heartache he shows in his interaction with the character Chris really made me fall for this Kyle Lewis guy. I thought "Wow, this guy can really act too. Why am I just now finding out about him?" I don't follow pop culture much. I assumed that maybe I missed seeing this guy starring in some Hollywood summer blockbuster. Or, maybe while waiting in the grocery checkout, I hadn't noticed his photo on the cover of People magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive" issue. Whatever. There had to be something else out there about, and with, Brett Claywell that I had missed. So I went onto the internet to search for the Brett Claywell treasure I was sure existed somewhere. Much to my surprise, there actually isn't much of Brett out there. There's a dirth of web pages, images, and there isn't even much in the way of other, currently-available projects that Brett has appeared in. At least I did find some Youtube videos of past OLTL episodes I had missed. They provided a glimpse of Kyle Lewis' backstory. They also provided a glimpse of Brett dancing around, stripped down to a pair of leather chaps. I haven't been able to get that image out of my mind, especially all night long in my fantasies (not that I'm trying to get it out of my mind). There are some people who have criticised Brett's dancing as a bit "clumsy". But if you've focussed on his dancing, then you've missed the real show. I also managed to stumble upon a couple printed interviews, as well as two internet radio interviews starring Brett's very own remarkable voice, and equally remarkable laugh. The interviews revealed him to be quite funny, smart, articulate, and absolutely charming. I thought "This guy is just about perfect. I would give anything to have a boyfriend like this. (Brett, if you're reading this, I can't give you anything in practice. But I've saved up a bit of money. Feel free to contact me and let me know how much it would cost me for at least one night with you). I guess this is about the time I developed my... um... interest?... appreciation?... infatuation?... totally uncontrollable, but slightly short of dangerous, obsession?... with Brett.

I'm warning you. Don't get me angry or I'll get intense... and intensely sexy at the same time.

I'm giving you my "Come hither" look. Don't worry if your legs collapse. You can still crawl to me on your hands and knees.

Brett's previous, biggest project appears to be a television show called One Tree Hill in which he played the character Tim. Fortunately, the show has been released on DVD, so I was able to satiate my now-deranged Claywell fixation. There are three things I learned about Brett from watching One Tree Hill: One would think with his leading man looks, remarkably strong voice, and penchant for intense emoting, he's best suited for dramatic roles. One would be only half right. He's one of those rare actors that's even better with comedy. In fact, given the zeal with which he delivers comedic lines, I suspect he actually prefers comedic roles. He loves to steal the scene everytime he's in the frame with another actor. Sure, in his interviews, he's gracious in praising the talents of his co-stars. But when the red light comes on that camera, his performance screams "Point that lens over here, and give me my close-up, Mr. Cecil B. DeMille!" Brett has matured very, very nicely. See the pictorial timeline below.

Brett's Pictorial Timeline

Sure, I was a cute kid when I was like 11 years old...

... and by the time I was old enough to be on TV, I was sexy, but...

... BAM!!! Look what I grew up to be. Now, I'm hotter than a bowl of spicey chili served up in Hell.

A guy isn't hot unless he has dimples? I've got some dimples for you right here.

Currently, my livelihood consists of being kissed by cute guys on TV. Lucky, aren't they?

I also managed to track down a couple episodes of a TV show Brett appeared in called Dollhouse. In one episode, Brett is stripped shirtless and handcuffed to a bed. Ok, now I no longer have that image of a leather-chaps-wearing cowboy in my head. But oh boy, you should see the new image playing in my nightly fantasies. I'm almost afraid of what Brett's next project may conjure up. Anyway, it seemed wrong that a guy this appealing didn't have more about him online, so I decided to put up this page about Brett, with some pretty images.

Look at this beautiful face about to cry. I need to be consoled, and hugged, and kissed, and... um... handcuffed.

I can be an innocent, baby-faced angel who inspires you.

Or the scruffy, devilish imp who corrupts you.

Either way, these lips are like nothing else you'll ever have tasted.

Look deep into these gorgeous, brown eyes and count backwards from 10. I'm going to hypnotize you with my beauty.

They say the eyes are the window to the soul. If so, my windows are more magnificent than the stained glass ones at the Sistine Chapel.

So you've somehow managed to escape the lure of my beckoning eyes? No matter. I will now dazzle you with my seductive smile. Resist at your own peril.

Scott actually gets paid to do this!

I'll let you run your fingers through my hair, once you stop shaking in awe.

This is the look I'm going to give if I don't win a daytime emmy for my OLTL performance.

Don't forget to breathe when you look at me, or you'll turn blue.