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From the "Wedding Writer" comes a hilarious tale of one woman's journey toward finding the one...and finding herself in the process.
The Quest for the Holy Veil
Kimberly Llewellyn
Berkley Books
ISBN 0425213730
March 2007
Wanted: Attractive, discreet, twenty-something female to lure disillusioned
clients back to matchmaking service. Good money. Dinners included.
Lucy Ladelle has big dreams -- bigger than the tiny island in Boston Harbor
where she's lived her entire life. But first she needs some moolah. So when
a matchmaking service hires her as date bait, she jumps at the chance.
She'll meet a few men, flatter their egos, and give them a sense of hope so
they'll sign on as clients. It's only temporary...and, anyway, this counts
as acting, right?
But Lucy's first "date" goes down the tubes when she's caught on tape by a
sting-operation TV exposé on the sketchy matchmaking firm. And Lucy's
name -- and fetching new sandals -- are dragged through the mud. They practically
accuse her of turning tricks...
The only bright spot comes when, in the ladies' room, she meets a
larger-than-life woman who offers her a chance to audition for an actual
Broadway show. Of course, the offer comes with a price. And before she knows
it, Lucy is juggling a surprising new romance and the professional chance of
a lifetime -- not to mention some very strange adventures...
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"The Quest for the Holy Veil is a wild roller-coaster ride! Llewellyn's voice is witty, cheeky, and
sexy...a hilarious combination."
--Virginia Henley, award-winning, best-selling author
"The Quest for the perfect comedy is over! Kimberly Llewellyn has written a delightful romp with a
toe-curling hero, an adorable heroine, and a cast of colorful characters you'll never forget!"
--Roxanne St. Claire, award-winning, best-selling author
"All the world's a stage...and I'm getting booed off."
Have you ever had one of those terrifically no-fat, bloat-free, good-hair days where
everything is going fabulously well and even the fashion gods are smiling down upon you?
Right.
Neither have I.
Which is why I -- Lucy Ladelle -- am hauling my too-rounded butt all over my too-
messy apartment, frantically getting ready like a mad woman for a last-minute lunch date. A one-hour lunch
is such a safe, convenient way to meet someone for the first time. Why? Because you can get out fast without
having to pay the waiter to sneak you out the back entrance. You already know it'll end soon. A one-hour
lunch is practically standard when dating these days.
After a fast shower, I quickly dance under a follow-up powder-shower of perfumed
talc -- Chanel No. 5 -- hoping for maximum coverage.
Today is a blind date. And I wish the guy were actually blind so he won't notice
my heightened, frenetic state. Being a nervous wreck when meeting someone for the first time just ain't
sexy.
Within minutes, my recently lightened hair is brushed and preened. I've gone from
mousy brown to a deep golden blonde, Schwarzkopf Golden Charisma, Level Seven. Makeup, all from Sephora,
is minimally applied. Miniskirt, blue and flirty. Top; a soft, pastel white-and-blue paisley jersey with
bell sleeves, compliments of my older sister's closet, only she doesn't know it.
The top plunges low to serve as a cheap ruse of the sexual goods I have to offer.
I also hope it'll be a distraction to how the rest of me feels (like hell). But I'm looking pretty busty
today since I'm bloated to kingdom-come due to my period. And who ordered the la carte menu options of
head pain and upset stomach to go along with the side dish of bloating?
Maybe it's just nerves.
After bursting into my walk-in closet, I drop to my knees (hell, even my kneecaps
are bloated) and dig through the piles of strappies and pumps until finding my latest treasured possession;
a pair of white sequin, no-name, cork-wedge sandals that will at least pretend to give my water-logged legs
a shapely appearance. My friends call shoes like these, "Lucy shoes" because I wear this style so dang much.
These funky chunkies are pretty comfy and provide just enough height to make me a perfect five-foot-six, a
great altitude for a single gal dating her way through life. Speaking of dates, I'm running so late for this
one that my head's spinning.
Then again, the spinning could be from my headache. Not a good day to have the curse,
as my mother still calls it.
Mental Note: Must choke down Pamprin.
P.S. to mental note: Must swallow vodka as a chaser to Pamprin.
No. Vodka with Pamprin wouldn't make a good first impression. Not a good idea to
show up all PMSed and drunk when meeting a man for the first time. But I'm tempted. Truly tempted...
The Wedding Writer -
Known as the "Wedding Writer," Kimberly Llewellyn enjoys writing comedic women's fiction.
"Animated and fun" describes this author's writing style.
"I really like exploring the crazy struggles that a woman faces today, whether on the home front,
in her social circles, or her love life. I especially like to take certain aspects of a main
character and magnify it tenfold to really get into the head and heart of that person."
Llewellyn also enjoys writing short stories and nonfiction articles. She gives workshops on
writing fiction when time allows. She makes guest appearances on TV and gives newspaper interviews.
A former New Englander, Kimberly Llewellyn now pens her prose amid the palm trees of Florida.
Word-of-Mouth Phenomenon! Word is spreading fast about Kimberly Llewellyn's high-energy, funny,
dynamic books. People are recommending her books to their friends, family members,
and coworkers with the promise of lots of laughs and a great a read. So be sure to tell everyone you know,
"You've got to get this book!"
